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| "Yeet!" Scarbrand roared, hurling the great spear toward the charging frost giant... |
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Why You Shouldn't Do This
There are a lot of books that have done this in recent years. Fourth Wing, Quicksilver, and A Court of Thorns and Roses to name a few. However, each of these acts as a good example of why using modern language in a non-modern story without thinking is a problem... because it undermines your world building, and it takes your readers out of the story.
Now, for clarity, I'm not talking about digging deep into the cultural origin of words here. If you're writing a story about a war on the other side of the galaxy between alien factions, and one of them has a heavily-armored vehicle with a large main gun and additional support weapons, you can still call it a tank. The fact that it's completely divorced from the weapon development during the first World War on Earth when the British tried to hide the development of these armored vehicles by claiming they were new kinds of water tanks (hence the name) isn't the sort of thing that's going to take readers out of the story for the most part.
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| Yeah, this one you can get away with. |
No, for this case what I'm talking about is using modern slang, or truly modern phrases, but letting them come out of the mouths of characters who have no business talking like this. As an example, if you have a high fantasy story about dragon riders, and one of them wants to compliment the other on a great feat of riding, or bravery in battle, they wouldn't clap them on the shoulder and say something like, "Based maneuver, comrade," or, "Poggers flying! You're lucky Skyrake didn't yeet you off."
If that example got a laugh out of you, good. However, the point remains that the way people talk, and the words they use, are a part of the underlying nature of the world your story takes place in. So if you're going to have particular phrases in your world, or particular pieces of slang, it's worth asking why they exist, and if they make sense given the culture of the world you've set up.
Just like how an urukhai declaring, "Looks like meat's back on the menu, boys!" means that there are restaurants in Mordor, and that these magically-grown murder monsters understand the concept of a menu in the first place, you can sometimes get away with one or two instances... but not if you're using it every, single conversation.
When You Can Get Away With It
As with every rule, there are always going to be exceptions. The first one, which might be a slightly controversial take, is that you can get away with these words if there is some kind of explanation that makes sense in-world. If you're writing a historical fantasy, for instance, you might come into contact with The Tiffany Problem, which is when we don't realize how far back into our history certain ideas, concepts, or even names can go. The other side of this coin is when you have stories set in the far future, but there are still bits of our colloquial language that have survived the test of time, even if the exact origin and meaning has been lost by those who've adopted particular turns of phrase.
More on the Tiffany Problem in the video below, if you haven't seen it yet.
The second time when you can more or less get away with modern parlance is when it's a word that conveys a particular feeling, but you don't want to make up something unique to this setting. As a for-instance, lots of fantasy novels will have made-up swear words in them ("bags" was a common one in the fantasy novels by Terry Goodkind, for instance), but it's quite common for grittier or more hard-edged books like the Witcher series, or the First Law series, to just use modern swear words. Shit, fuck, damn, and so on are all perfectly serviceable, and they've existed in some way for hundreds, if not thousands of years. So even if these aren't the specific swear words we're hearing (if you subscribe to the idea that fantasy stories are written in the native language of that world, and we are seeing a translated version of the tale), the meaning is more important than the specific word in this context. And sometimes made-up swear words just don't convey the right feeling.
The third situation where you can get away with this, and where it might even be the whole point of the story you're writing, is when it is done for comedic effect. This is particularly true when we stray into the realm of parody. For example, perhaps you want to have a traditional high fantasy story, but all the characters talk like they're in a high school teen drama from the 1990s. Maybe you want to write a cyberpunk novel set in an alternate year 2020, but while the technology is all vastly different, the subcultures and slang are largely the same, which is kind of a hilarious juxtaposition. Perhaps you want the aliens to talk in an ancient Earth dialect because that was the most recent trasmission they received, so they all sound and act like they're from the 1950s, even though the book is set much further along in the future than that.
This is perhaps the most important thing to remember... the juxtaposition of something familiar from our world with a fantastical setting is inherently funny in a lot of ways. So if you're doing this for comedy, it's going to go over pretty well. But if you want people to take these characters seriously, the way they're talking is going to be a pretty big issue to look past, even if the rest of the story is meant to be poe-faced... and honestly, that might just make it funnier.
As an example, check out my mystery-solving noir cat novels Marked Territory and Painted Cats. They're inherently ridiculous... which is part of what makes their very serious tone just add to the joke!
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That's all for this week's Craft of Writing! For more of my work, check out my Vocal archive, or at My Amazon Author Page where you can find books like my sci-fi dystopian thriller Old Soldiers, the Hardboiled Cat series about a mystery solving Maine Coon in Marked Territory and Painted Cats, my sword and sorcery novel Crier's Knife, or my most recent short story collection The Rejects!
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